I CAME DOWN WITH ONE OF THOSE VIRUSES THAT ARE GOING AROUND RIGHT NOW.
THE CONGESTION IS SO PRODIGIOUS, THAT ALMOST NO ONE CAN UNDERSTAND ME RIGHT NOW...MAKES FOR SOME FUNNY INTERACTIONS.
TO WIT:
I HAD THIS FUNNY INTERACTION IN A DEPARTMENT STORE YESTERDAY:
ME: "DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS?"
THEM: "huh...what do you want???? YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT TYPE I AM?????"
ME: "no, no...DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS?"
THEM: "YOU WANT TO KNOW WHERE THE TIE IS? The tie department is over there."
ME: "no, no...the TIME, the TIME!"
THEM: "You can buy THYME at Sur La Table. Go outside and turn right. 3 stores down."
BY NOW, I REMEMBERED SOMETHING IMPORTANT. DON'T EXPERTS TELL US THAT 93% OF ALL DAILY COMMUNICATION IS NON-VERBAL?
WELL, I FINALLY JUST "MIMED A PERSON LOOKING AT THEIR WATCH" , WITH EXTRA POINTING AT MY WRIST FOR EMPHASIS.
THEM: (breaking into big smile) "OH, YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS!?!?" (HILARIOUS LAUGHTER ERUPTS!!!!)
ME: (FORGOING SPEECH, I JUMP UP AND DOWN LIKE A KID IN A CANDY STORY)
THEM: "OH, IT'S 7:12".
ME: (still forgoing speech and doing something that can not ever be misunderstood, I smile my thanks.)
THEM: (SMILING BACK) "YOU'RE WELCOME!" :)
SO THERE YOU HAVE IT...
MY CONGESTION DOESN'T ACTUALLY IMPEDE MY COMMUNICATION...
LIKE EVERYTHING ELSE IN LIFE,
YOU JUST HAVE TO ROLL WITH IT.
